One potential custody solution for parents who are getting divorced is called birdnesting. This flips the traditional relationship model, where the parents each have a home and the children move in and out. Instead, the children have a central home that they live in all of the time, and it is the parents who move in and out.
Birdnesting does have its drawbacks, largely related to the fact that the divorced parents still need to share a living space—even if they do so on an alternating schedule—and communicate about things like daily chores or maintenance costs. It can also be very expensive because people may need to own multiple properties. But when it works, there are some major advantages.
Creating stability
For the children, birdnesting is one way to create a greater sense of stability after a divorce. Life may not feel all that different to the children, and they are still in a familiar setting. They have the same neighbors, peer groups, school system, etc. At home, they know that they have the same bedroom, clothes, toys and everything else that they’re used to.
Another advantage is simply that there is far less commuting for the kids. Say that two parents live 40 minutes apart after getting divorced. If they had to exchange the children on the 2-2-3 parenting schedule, they would be making that drive multiple times per week. But, birdnesting gives the children more time to be in the home with their siblings and/or the parent who has custody.
Birdnesting is just one potential custody solution, and it helps to show why parents need to consider their options carefully.