Everybody who gets married hopes that they’re about to get their fairytale ending and live “happily ever after” with their spouse.

But, what if you don’t? How can you tell when your marriage just isn’t going to live up to your expectations and is actually pretty…well, unhappy?

Here are three of the major signs that your marriage isn’t working:

1. Your spouse is keeping secrets (or you are)

We’re not even talking about big secrets, like infidelity. Secrets indicate that you and your spouse don’t fully trust each other — even when the secrets are small. When you don’t fully trust your spouse and receive full trust in return, that’s a marriage-killer.

2. You just don’t find any reason to laugh together

Life has plenty of ups and downs, but your partner should always be there to make you laugh — at least every now and then. If your spouse’s dumb jokes and silly antics just seem tiresome and foolish instead of making you laugh, that’s a sign that you aren’t really enjoying their company anymore.

3. You and your spouse are living separate lives

Do you feel more like you live with a roommate instead of a spouse? You don’t have to spend all your time together (and probably shouldn’t) to have a happy marriage, but you should have quality time together. If your physical intimacy is lacking for no obvious reason, you no longer feel the need to “check in” with your spouse when you’re out and you’d rather spend time with your friends than your life partner, that’s a sign you’ve already mentally and emotionally parted ways.

If these three points hit home, it may be time to think about your options. There’s no point investing more time and energy into something that doesn’t work. A divorce can free you and your spouse up to find new, happier matches.